Sleepover At The Wal-Mart

John and I almost had to have a sleepover at the Wal-Mart.  The thought of which makes my brother in laws blood run cold.  Here’s what went down.

John and I go to Wal-Mart to do a little light browsing and shopping for our date night.  When we go in it is a nice and pleasant night.  Slight breeze, nothing too terrible for these parts, no snow, kinda calm.  We are in the old WM for oh like about 40 minutes or so taking our time as we carouse their delightful selection of socks and gloves, we stopped to smell the candles and picked out a few food items.  Nothing big.  After we check out we are still giddy from a fulfilling night at WM when we get to the front doors.  I’ll be a you know what if it was the wildest blizzard I may have ever witnessed in my life.  It was a blizzard like those poor pioneer people used to get lost in on their way back from the outhouse.  We couldn’t see the cars in the lot until we almost ran into them.  If it weren’t for the big flood lights they have John and I would have been just like those pioneers and we probably would have died in a frozen huddled mass with our newly purchased game of Monopoly and the Diet Dr. Pepper I had just bought for my friend for Christmas, and our families could have passed down the story of our death for generations.  But lucky for us that didn’t happen.

We made it to our car and jumped in.  Once in we began the process of scraping the snow off of our faces, out of our ears, and trying to shake it loose from our scalp.  We couldn’t even see the cars from the next row over it was completely blacked out.  As we sat and waited for the storm to pass we made our plans for if worse came to worse and we had to spend the night at the Wal-Mart.  Here is what we decided.  First we would stake our claim on the only futon they have in their small furniture section, and snatch some nice pillows and blankets and new set of sheets.  Then we grab a large tent and set up shop in the TV department with a few DVDs.  For dinner we would get us a Subway sandwich since there is one conveniently located at the front of the store.  Oh and they do have microwaves so we could make some popcorn for our movie night.  We would have to make friends and fast because we all know that situations like that can turn hairy at a moments notice, so we would need to form alliances.  It would be like Survivor Wal-Mart. 

As luck would have it the storm passed right before we put our plan into action, so we are now home safe and sound.  But think about it, if you had to spend the night in Wal-Mart, what would you go after first?


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